We learned this last month, when the internet exploded over summer penis, a peculiar occurrence in which your dong allegedly swells up in size during the summer.
Apparently, the balmy summer months are a prime season for bizarre dick phenomena.
We learned this last month, when the internet exploded over summer penis, a peculiar occurrence in which your dong allegedly swells up in size during the summer.
After MEL Magazine's Tracy Moore reported on summer penis, many men on social media confirmed the phenomenon, chiming in with their own tales of how their shafts feel and look larger when temps start to soar.
Unfortunately, guys, summer penis isn't a thing - at least, not exactly. While it's possible that gentle heat can help increase blood flow to the penis, thus making it appear slightly larger, sexual health experts say that such effects would be temporary and would likely be so negligible as to be nearly non-existent. Bummer!
But that doesn't mean that "summer penis" doesn't exist, albeit in a different (and not altogether pleasant) form. We're talking about stickiness. We're talking about sweatiness. We're talking about what happens when, after a long, grueling day at the office, you come home and take off your underwear and are met with a waft of musty smells so appalling and shameful that at first you assume it's emanating from a dead possum in your closet.
We're talking about swamp dick, a.k.a. the humid, stench-filled area around your penis and testicles.
Much like its better-known cousin, swamp ass, swamp dick is a taboo topic; after all, no dude wants to admit they have a primordial soup brewing in their boxer briefs. Swamp penis is also deceiving, because it lurks beneath your underwear all day; like Bloody Mary, it really only emerges when summoned. No one at the office would ever know that beneath your glossy, clean-cut exterior lies a sweltering, itchy creature from the deep.
That said, swamp dick happens to most of us at one point or another, particularly if you're not being rigorous about bathing or showering during the steamy summer months. Here's why it happens, and how you can get rid of it.
Why you get swamp penis
So why, exactly, does swamp penis tend to rear its ugly head exclusively during the summer months?
Dr. Michael L. Eisenberg, a urologist at the Stanford University School of Medicine, explains that warmer temperatures can increase the amount of sweat and moisture in the genital area. "Moist and dark places can be ideal environments for some bacteria and fungus, which can lead to odor, itching, and some bothersome skin infections," such as jock itch, which causes an itchy, flaky red rash.
That said, it is theoretically possible to get swamp dick any time of the year. Generally speaking, "the groin is not exposed to sun and air as often as the rest of the body," notes Dr. Jamin Brahmbhatt, urologist at Orlando Health and assistant professor at the UCF College of Medicine. "It can also be covered by multiple layers of clothing, which can make the area prone to getting damp."
Brahmbhatt also adds that the groin's close proximity to the rectum "allows the urine and feces to be close to each other," thus creating a recipe for swamp penis.
Is swamp penis harmful?
In itself, no, not really. But clinical sexologist Dr. Deb Laino says that if you are uncircumcised, swamp dick could potentially lead to balanitis, a bacterial infection that is caused by improper cleaning of the foreskin and leads to inflammation of the head of the penis.
If you develop a fungal infection like a yeast infection, it's also theoretically possible for it to be transmitted between partners during unprotected sex. Though this is relatively uncommon, it's probably smart to use a condom.
How to prevent swamp penis
So what are the best ways to ward off the scourge of swamp penis? Brahmbhatt says simple things like wearing non-tight-fitting clothing is a good practical way to keep it at bay. Clothes made from natural fibers like cotton and linen are also good, because air can travel through them faster. Opt for loose-fitting boxers with ample leg room.
Brahmbhatt also notes that when you get out of the shower, you need to make sure your skin is completely dry before you put your clothes on. And "if you are not circumcised, make sure you retract the foreskin and clean your foreskin and whats underneath it," he adds.
Laino recommends "rubbing some organic coconut oil on the testicles and shaft and even on the upper legs" after showering, because coconut oil has been proven to have antifungal properties. But if your skin is extra-sensitive down there, you can probably forego any additional products and just wash with good old soap and water instead.
If you follow these tips, you should be fine. While people probably won't be complimenting you for having a pleasantly scented crotch, it sure beats them taking one whiff and running for the hills.