"It's okay to feel you need compliments or appreciation, but never forget that being unique is God's way of adding variety to our world"
Over time I've observed how people tend to want others to help them feel better about themselves or something related to their work or life.
I am only Me!
Don't get me wrong,It's okay to feel you need compliments or appreciation, but never forget that being unique is God's way of adding variety to our world.
There's something about everyone of us that is peculiar to only us, whether you're twins or of the same family, no two human beings have exactly the same characteristics. Come to think of it, in this age of social media where the number of likes or retweets a post has can determine the overall mood of the poster for that day.
Some people will end up reposting that particular thing until it meets the number of likes or retweets they think it deserves. I'm not saying this is bad, it's okay to put yourself out there, you never can tell when you'd get noticed and get that big break.
Negative thoughts?
My dilemma is the motive behind it, are you posting just to get likes or you are doing it to meet a need, sell a brand or educate others? Let's leave social media and talk about our day-to-day lives. A friend stopped wearing a very nice outfit to work just because a colleague said the colour reminded her of a frog. This particular dress actually complements her skin tone and enhances her already beautiful amber coloured eyes, but this colleague was obviously jealous and decided to run her mouth without caution.
I told her not to pay the jealous lady any attention but she already saw reasons why this dress wouldn't see the light of day anymore. Just a silly statement changed her overall mood for that week, made her rip the dress and made her stop wearing green. Quite extreme right?
Self Esteem.
We need to learn to grow ourselves into beings that would need more than a few negative words to be moody. Personally I'm very interested in building my self esteem and anyone trying to make me feel otherwise is completely shut off from my life and all that concerns me.
It didn't happen in a day, I had to consistently decide to shun anything negative and have a continuous determination to be the best I could possibly be. If you look inwards, you'll realize you've got that strength too. The willpower is there, you don't need the validation of others to feel good about yourself, you are enough!
Self Audit.
You shouldn't depend solely on the perception of others, your life is too precious to be subjected to such. Instead you should strive to make sure you're a better person than you were yesterday, you don't need a soothsayer to tell you that. You can do self audit, delete those you feel aren't adding anything meaningful to your life, instead hell-bent on pulling you down. They are called excess baggage, in life's journey we need to travel light so as not to be weighed down easily.
A very good illustration is an airplane, heavy duty luggages cannot be carried on a plane (excluding cargo planes). Every passenger is allocated the maximum number of luggage weight they can carry. If you want to fly high in life, you have to let go of some things. Ignore negative vibes, stay focused on your goal, impact lives in your own little way and don't you ever give up.
Challenges are only a challenge.
Successful people all over the world today didn't get to where they are without challenges. If they had decided to listen to destructive comments, maybe some of the witty inventions we've today will not see the light of day. Take a look around you, everyone is trying to outdo themselves, why should you let them make you the object of their amusement? Take charge, do the things you love, be yourself, the world will adjust. I'm not afraid to say exactly how I feel, our society never taught girls to be outspoken but I am because I can be... Gradually I'm becoming that fine young woman God has destined me to be.
Of course you'd encounter challenges, like I said your attitude would determine if you will allow yourself to be overwhelmed or be the force of change in today's world. The choice is yours. You deserve the very best in life, don't ever settle for less. It won't be easy, remember you're a lot braver than you think. Always put your best foot forward and believe in yourself.
I am Enough.
You're Enough..
So long!
Written by Adekunbi Bello.
Bello Adekunbi "Kunbella" is an effervescent soul, bookish and loves watching classical movies. If she's not writing, taking long strolls on the beach or dancing, her head will definitely be buried in a book. Catch her on Instagram @kunbi_bello, Twitter @adekunbi_bello or Google #kunbellawrites.